爱多少早知道

早知道我会爱得受不了
就该随身带着一把剪刀
把所有我不爱的画面都去掉
是否我会更好
早知道认识你像玩高空弹跳
拉着你我爱的距离忽大忽小
也许认识我的时候你就知道
你对我的爱有多少

What Should i Do?

what should i do?
what should i do?
what should i do?
what should i do?
what should i do?
what should i do???????

heart pain
heart pain
heart pain
heart pain
heart pain
heart pain
heart pain
heart pain
heart pain

feel like crying but i cant bring myself to cry!!!!
WHY???????
SUCK...the tears like stuck there don want to come out!
WHY????
but i feel so damn upset!! VERY UPSET!!!!
WHY???
shit.......feel so horrible now by this kind of feelings...sian!!

MEL...updated!

well well..where should i start?
lets start with my IPP.
my job scoop is to pick up phone calls
the calls car mainly from the logistic company
when they have to import or export goods
they have to submit permit to custom
and they have to use this software design by my company
and this software somethings will prompt error
so when ppl is a noob to computers software
they will call in to this software provider
and thats us....so we have to solve this error for them

and during this period of time
many things happen during this i can say
things happen in friendship, family
my parent relationship is like a big ship going to shink in a big ocean
and mayb i am just a small fishing sanpan going pass the ship
trying to rescue but my strength is too small...
disappointed i can say... really sad
they are already living in this world for so long
and they still stay in those dinosuar era
so childish !! i think i am so much mature than them can..
well..i cant comment so much! its adult affair what can i say?
but why my mum keep wanting me to interfer? don you think its unfair?
wat i can say is... when time to say good bye...so be it! its fate...

lets talk about fishball birthday celebration
so happy for her.. her life is so much beautiful now
she found a nice guy who willing to take care of her
pamper her, dots her do anything for her...
CONGRATE FISHBALL!!! cherish it orh...

met melvina finally!!
miss her deep deep la...
planning to have another dinner tgt
WHEN WHEN???
and also CONGRAT her...got a new job.
workhard yeah? love ya....

ok! this is the end of this session..
will continue ok? well..actually there is more to say
but...i choose to say it instead of typing it here
haha... BYE! have a nice day...

I AM BACK!!

Finally, i am back to where i belong
SO UNWILLINGLY!!!!
hate to be here...seriously..
the life in Suzhou is the best
but too bad...good time always end fast
these 26 days, i learn a lot...
i learn about friendship~
getting to know many people
i learnt to bargain
i learnt to keep myself healthy
i learnt to be independent
but, sad to say
i have not learn how to cherish
and to have to end the trip
cherish the moment
only at the less day..
we get to fly a kite
we get to bond with people who
we don tok to during the first day
we get to buy fireworks together (WEEEEE)
we get to put fireworks together
we get to go heart to heart talk every night
how do we get a chance to do a heart to heart talk
session in singapore!!! HOW????
its seriously impossible....
holding our pillows sitting on the bed
watching some kind of artistic movie together
in the middle of the night...
HOW can we find time to do this in singapore??
I am who i am in Suzhou ... thats the real me
but back in singapore.. i begin to hide the real me
just the first day in singapore, my mum irritate me..
and now i realise, i have to listen to her naggings and
haolianing of her so call BOYFRIENDS!!! and
telling me she don "love" my dad anymore..
I DON WAN TO LISTEN TO ALL THESE~~~
i wan back my suzhou life seriously...
i hate staying at home...its SUCK!!!!
suck to the deepest part of earth...
SUCK SUCK SUCK...unlimited SUCK to describe
this morning my brother ask me
"how still use to ur bed? " den i was like
am i now in singapore??? oh SHIT... i am back SUCK!
i tout i was like dreaming...but i am not!!! ( how i wish i am)
those days in Suzhou is like a dream..
a dream that i HAVE to wake up unwillingly
i am so unwilling to come back sg yet
Ok! in suzhou i seriouly misses my toilet and bed
but now back here i realise i miss more thingy there
i miss the food , the weather, the freedom , shou zua bing
the cheap price there and most importantly
the CLIQUE!!!!!!! we spend like so much time tgt
even after room check, we still have a heart to heart session
before going into our lalaland!! now... i have htht myself lor..
our friendship will NEVER end..NEVER can it end
it will always extend till we even lying in the cofin!!
yeah! AND finally a big thanks to all people in Suzhou
i really do have a lot of fun...the most fun i even have in my life
:)

one more day

one more day i will be flying to china suzhou
i don know what is my feeling now?
am i excited or 依依不舍...
to be honest, i cant wait to go
really... cant wait to leave this house
whats wrong with this family
why my mum and my dad like that
trying not to hate them
but seriously...i hate them..
i hate not becoz i want to
i hate them becoz their action, their speech
they way they act as a parents
they fail to reach my expectation
as a parents...in my mind...

however...this is myfate..
it's destined that they will be my parents
therefore...i have to live with it
i understand... i hate them its becoz i cherish them
i wish that they will know this point
and make life easier...
i hope that this one month absent at home
they can reflect on themselve...

this goes the same to my brother
his attitude change after going to JC
i don know is it stress in school or what
i just wish to let him know that
i can always listen...but just please
brother don show this kind of sucky
attitude at home...this really spoil mood
and please take care of papa mummy when
i am not at home make sure they don quarrel
anything talk nicely don need to be loud okie...
and try to spend more time outside your room...
today mother just tell me that she almost forgotten
that she has a son sleeping in that room..
this is really sad hearing this and me too...
i almost forgotten i have a brother...
its time for u to grow up
understand?? finally..
PLEASE DO WASH MY HAMSTERS AND CHECK THEIR FOOD AND WATER!
THANKS....